Autistic individuals are often unfairly stereotyped as lacking empathy. This myth can be hurtful and misleading.
In reality, many autistic people do feel empathy deeply, though they may express it in ways that neurotypical people do not immediately recognize.
The Myth: Do Autistic People Lack Empathy?
One pervasive myth is that autistic people simply don’t have empathy.
This idea took hold in early autism research decades ago, which described autistic individuals as “mind-blind” or unable to understand others’ thoughts and feelings.
Such early theories suggested a general lack of perspective-taking ability in autism, leading to the stereotype that autistic people cannot empathize at all.
Origins of the Myth
Psychologist Simon Baron-Cohen and others in the 1980s and 1990s theorized that autism involved a core deficit in understanding others’ minds (often called a lack of Theory of Mind).
This was widely taught and publicized, reinforcing the notion that autistic individuals inherently lack empathy.
Persistence in Society
Even today, media portrayals and public misconceptions sometimes paint autistic people as emotionless or uncaring.
Phrases like “autistic people have no empathy” still appear in conversations and articles, despite evidence to the contrary.
Reality Check
Lacking empathy is a myth – autism might affect how empathy is processed or shown, but it does not mean autistics have no empathy.
In fact, many autistic individuals deeply care about others’ feelings. We must distinguish myth from reality to avoid unfair labels.
This myth can cause significant harm, which we will discuss later. First, it’s important to understand what empathy actually is, and the different forms it takes.
What Is Empathy? Cognitive vs. Emotional Empathy
Empathy isn’t a single, simple trait – it has different components. Two key types often discussed are cognitive empathy and emotional empathy (also called affective empathy).
Breaking these down helps clarify how autistic people can be empathetic in some ways even if they struggle in others:
Cognitive Empathy
This is the ability to understand another person’s perspective or what they might be feeling and thinking.
It’s like mind-reading in a sense – figuring out someone else’s mental state. Psychologists often link this to “Theory of Mind” or perspective-taking.
For example, noticing that a friend is sad because of their body language uses cognitive empathy.
Autistic individuals may find this challenging at times, especially if social cues are subtle.
Emotional (Affective) Empathy
This is the capacity to share or feel what another person is feeling emotionally. It’s an automatic emotional response – you see someone in pain and you feel pain in your heart for them.
For instance, if your sibling is crying, you might feel tearful or ache for them; that’s emotional empathy.
Many autistic people have intact or even intense emotional empathy, meaning they genuinely feel others’ emotions deeply.
Can you have just one type of empathy?
It’s possible to have one type of empathy without the other. Some autistic individuals might struggle to decode what someone is thinking (cognitive empathy), yet care tremendously once they realize the person is upset (emotional empathy).
On the other hand, an autistic person might intellectually know someone is hurt but feel overwhelmed or unsure how to respond emotionally in the moment. Each person’s empathy profile is unique.
Understanding these two sides of empathy helps dispel the myth. Autistic people may have a different balance of cognitive vs. emotional empathy, but this does not equal a lack of compassion.
Research Insights: Autism and Empathy in Studies
Research on autism and empathy has evolved a lot in recent years. Early studies often supported the stereotype, but newer studies paint a more nuanced picture. Here are some key research findings and theories that help explain empathy in autism:
Early Research – “Mind-Blindness”
Early work by researchers (like Baron-Cohen) suggested autistic people couldn’t infer others’ thoughts or feelings, dubbing this mind-blindness. This was interpreted as an empathy deficit.
Psychology textbooks for years taught that autistic individuals universally lack theory of mind, which was taken to mean a lack of empathy.
However, these conclusions were overgeneralizations based on specific tests (like reading facial expressions or “false-belief” story tasks).
Double Empathy Problem
A breakthrough idea from autistic scholar Damian Milton in 2012 reframed the issue.
The “double empathy problem” theory proposes that communication difficulties between autistic and non-autistic people are two-way misunderstandings, not a one-sided lack of empathy.
In other words, autistic people may socialize and empathize well with each other (showing typical empathy among themselves), but gaps arise when different communication styles meet.
It’s not that autistic people have no empathy, but rather that neurotypical people might not understand their way of expressing it, and vice versa.
Role of Alexithymia
Researchers have found that a trait called alexithymia (difficulty in recognizing and describing one’s own emotions) often co-occurs with autism and can affect empathy measures.
One study found that what looked like “empathy deficits” in autistic participants were mostly explained by whether the person had alexithymia, not autism itself.
This means an autistic person who has trouble identifying their own emotions might also struggle to interpret others’ emotions – but autistic individuals without alexithymia tend to show typical empathy.
In short, it’s not autism per se that reduces empathy, but sometimes a separate condition.
Neuroscience Findings
Newer neurological research offers encouraging evidence that autistic and neurotypical brains may not be so different in empathy.
A 2022 study using brain scans found no significant differences between autistic and non-autistic people in key brain regions associated with empathy (such as parts of the prefrontal cortex and amygdala).
This suggests that the fundamental capacity for empathy is present. Earlier theories about mirror neurons (brain cells linked to understanding others’ actions and feelings) being “broken” in autism are also being reconsidered – recent studies show the picture is more complex and not a simple deficit.
It’s a Spectrum
Just as autism is a spectrum, empathy within autism is not one-size-fits-all. Some autistic people might indeed struggle more with empathy (especially cognitive empathy), while others might be exceptionally empathetic.
There are autistic individuals who work as counselors, teachers, or in care professions – roles requiring empathy.
Research and countless personal stories confirm that many autistic people are empathetic, though it may manifest in diverse ways.
Overall, modern research dispels the old myth that autism equals no empathy. Instead, it points to differences in communication, varying individual profiles, and external factors like alexithymia.
Autistic people can understand and care about others’ feelings, especially in supportive environments or when communication styles are bridged.
Personal Experiences: Autistic People on Empathy
Statistics and studies are important, but hearing from autistic individuals themselves can be even more powerful to understand empathy from a personal perspective.
Many autistic people have shared that they do experience empathy – often intensely. Here are a few insights and quotes reflecting real experiences (names omitted for privacy):
- “When someone I love is hurting, I feel that pain too. I might not know the perfect thing to say or do, but I care so much it aches.” – An autistic adult describing emotional empathy.
- “I often pick up on people’s emotions like a sponge. If a friend is anxious, suddenly I’m anxious too and I don’t always realize why until later.” – Another autistic person on absorbing others’ feelings.
- “Sometimes I empathize so deeply that I get overwhelmed. I’ve had to leave the room when a coworker was crying because I was about to cry as well.” – Illustrating how strong empathy can lead to being overwhelmed.
- “I might not show empathy in the way people expect, like making eye contact or giving a hug, but I might try to solve the problem or quietly listen. That’s me showing I care.” – An autistic individual on expressing empathy differently.
These accounts show that autistic people absolutely can care and empathize. However, the way they experience or express it might not always match social norms.
It’s also worth noting that some autistic individuals describe their empathy as “atypical” – they might feel strong empathy towards animals, or have deep empathy in specific situations but not understand immediate social cues.
Personal stories vary widely, but they collectively debunk the notion of “no empathy”. Instead, they highlight that empathy is present, though sometimes in a different key.
How Empathy May Look Different in Autistic Individuals
If autistic people are empathetic, why do some people still misinterpret them as unempathetic? The answer often lies in differences in communication and expression.
Here are some ways empathy might look different in autistic individuals:
Delayed or Different Emotional Responses
An autistic person might not immediately react to someone’s emotions in the moment. They may need extra time to process what the other person is feeling.
For instance, they might not comfort you right when you start crying, but later that day, they could quietly do something kind for you. This delay can be misread as not caring, when it’s actually a different timing of empathy.
Expressing Empathy Through Actions, Not Words
Instead of saying “I’m sorry you’re upset” (which a person with autism might find hard to formulate under emotional pressure), they might show concern by fixing a practical problem for you, sharing knowledge, or doing a thoughtful gesture.
This is empathy manifested in a problem-solving or action-oriented way.
Overwhelmed by Empathy
Paradoxically, an autistic individual might appear to withdraw or not respond at all in an emotional situation because they feel too much.
If they experience intense empathy, they might shut down or step away as a coping mechanism. Unfortunately, others might see this as coldness.
In reality, the autistic person is feeling so strongly that they have to protect themselves from that flood of emotion.
Focus on Specific Situations
Some autistic people have strong empathy triggered by certain scenarios (like seeing an animal in distress, or injustices in the world), even if they struggle to read a friend’s subtle sadness.
They may have a huge well of compassion for issues that resonate with them personally or logically, even if one-on-one emotional moments are tricky.
Body Language and Tone Differences
Neurotypical empathy often is conveyed through facial expressions, tone of voice, and quick reciprocity in conversation (“Oh no, that’s awful – are you okay?” with a pained look).
Autistic individuals might not use the same body language or vocal tone, so their concern might not come across in the expected way.
They could be internally very concerned but have a neutral expression due to neurodivergent communication styles.
It’s important not to mistake a flat affect or avoidance of eye contact as lack of empathy – the person might simply express their feelings differently or find eye contact uncomfortable despite caring a lot.
In summary, autistic empathy might be out-of-sync with typical social signals, but it is often very much present.
Educating both autistic and non-autistic people about these differences (for example, the non-autistic person learning to recognize and value those quiet acts of caring, and the autistic person learning some ways to communicate their feelings) can bridge misunderstandings.
The Harm of the “No Empathy” Stereotype
The false stereotype that autistic people lack empathy isn’t just incorrect – it’s also harmful. Believing this myth can negatively affect autistic individuals in many ways:
- Dehumanization and Stigma: Labeling a group as having “no empathy” can lead others to see them as less human or less feeling.
- Social Isolation: If peers, teachers, or coworkers believe an autistic person doesn’t care about others, they might exclude or avoid them. Autistic individuals may find themselves socially isolated, not given a chance to demonstrate their caring nature.
- Mental Health Impact: The stigma of being seen as unempathetic or uncaring can take a toll on autistic people’s mental health. Feeling consistently misunderstood or judged can contribute to anxiety or depression.
- Masking and Identity Issues: The empathy myth adds to the pressure to mask to fit in – a person might force themselves to perform expected empathetic responses (like feigning expressions) just to avoid negative judgment, even if it’s exhausting.
- Impact on Support and Services: If professionals (doctors, therapists, educators) buy into the “no empathy” stereotype, they might underestimate an autistic person’s emotional needs or not offer them appropriate support.
It’s clear that the empathy stereotype does real harm. Challenging and correcting this myth is crucial not only for individual well-being but also for fostering a more understanding and inclusive society.
Autistic people have consistently advocated that they are feeling human beings – their experiences and the research back this up.
References
Bird, G., Silani, G., Brindley, R., White, S., Frith, U., & Singer, T. (2010). Empathic brain responses in insula are modulated by levels of alexithymia but not autism. Brain, 133(5), 1515. https://doi.org/10.1093/brain/awq060
Shirayama, Y., Matsumoto, K., Osone, F., Hara, A., Guan, S., Hamatani, S., Muneoka, K., Sato, K., Okada, A., & Yokokawa, T. (2022). The Lack of Alterations in Metabolites in the Medial Prefrontal Cortex and Amygdala, but Their Associations with Autistic Traits, Empathy, and Personality Traits in Adults with Autism Spectrum Disorder: A Preliminary Study. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 54(1), 193. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-022-05778-7
